I saw her post. The title was eye-catching, I clicked. There were 4 photos, all of them clear, reasonably close-up, and all stunning. Beautiful face, glowing complexion, auburn hair blowing in the wind. Is that a tulip field behind her in that one? Is she on boat in this one? Blue skies, sun shining, her smile wide and bright. The ad was relatively brief yet charming and creatively intuitive. I knew she’d be getting a ton of responses.

I wrote her, told the truth about myself, attached a picture and hoped for the best. The next day I get a response, she asks a few questions, I answer, and she writes back with her phone number. That’s right, I didn’t need to provide proof of birth or a pay stub. I called and she picked up on the first ring. Her voice wasn’t high-pitched or deep, it was just normal and a little perky, she rambled on and then I rambled on. I called her again, and then again, our conversations were fluid, no awkward pauses, she was simultaneously available and unavailable. (more…)

My wife’s parents divorced when she was 6 years old. Her dad, a dentist in a small Tennessee town North of Chattanooga, was banging a 22-year-old LPN named Kristen. When my wife’s mother found out, she took her daughter and left. Eventually, she remarried. Her new husband turned out to be a perfectly nice guy, but he has nonetheless never made much of a living. My wife’s dad was married to Kristen before the ink was dry on the divorce, and she soon thereafter became the office manager of his thriving little dental practice. The next few years saw a flurry of legal activity between the two former spouses, mostly regarding my father-in-law’s repeated failure to pay child support. After a while, my mother-in-law got tired of having to fight for every last scrap, and just kind of threw up her hands. All told, he wound up not having to pay around 25 grand.

My wife didn’t see a whole lot of him growing up, or even after we got married. He’d invite us over, or we’d go out to eat with him here and there, but eventually, my wife just couldn’t take that. See, he had two more daughters with Kristen, and those two got everything. We’re talking horses, fancy vacations, and expensive private schooling. The older one got a spanking new Volvo when she was in high school, and the younger one a Jeep Cherokee. And shit like that. Meanwhile, the wife and I struggled with our young family, and it upset her that he didn’t even seem to care. He never asked her if she needed anything. (more…)

For those who don’t know yet, I enjoy the occasional massage. Truth be told, I hurt everywhere, scoliosis, uneven legs, arthritis. I am a 34 year old man in a 68 year old body. Of course, I have never been one to turn down the occasional ‘executive release’ one can get at a few places. I used to frequent this parlor in Chinatown, it’s clean, there is a shower in every room, and is reasonably staffed so that I never needed to wait nor needed an appointment.

Now, as far as massages goes, the place is so-so at best, there is only so much pressure a five-foot tall, 95lbs woman can exert on someone. However, the ‘finish’ has always been phenomenal to say the least. After a few times, I found out that I was mostly paying to get my rocks off more then to get properly treated.

Eventually, I stumbled upon this other parlor close to work which was staffed mostly with Russian immigrants. Now, the Russians have a different approach to massages, it is a lot more physical, true, it may vary from one masseuse to another, but overall, I can vouch that Russians masseuse work harder on the massage part than the Chinese ones. As far as ‘happy ending’ goes, well… Let’s just say that the Chinese are in a class of their own. (more…)

This is the beginning. I am waiting to receive an interesting, unordinary story.

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